Tuesday, April 24, 2012

33 Weeks and Counting

I told the world how much I hate being pregnant. I can't see my toes. I have 10 items of clothing left that I can wear and I am rotating these. My hips hurt, my lower back hurts, I am out of breathe faster and more often now. Jensen seems to like to stretch out his arms and legs in every direction at the same time, and constantly move. I feel like I am as big as a house. It has been nice for a few days (70-75 degrees) and I begged my husband to turn on the air conditioning. I have no idea how women are pregnant in the heat! 

I am 33 weeks and a few days...

My cervix is still shortening and I am on a round of steroid shots just in case Jensen decides to come early, (which they think he will)

Jakah was born at 38 weeks, I am expecting, hoping, wishing, praying, and crossing my fingers that Jensen will come around the same time. There are a few reasons it would be nice. Casey has to go to training 2 days after Jensen's due date, I'd like him to be in the same state for the birth, or not leaving right after. I'd also like to not share my birthday with him, so he needs to be after 37 weeks. (I'm selfish like that) Oh and the number 1 reason, I'd be done and he'd be here.

38 weeks is 5 weeks from now... or about a month.... yikes! Which moves me onto my next thoughts. 

As much as I want to be done, I have realized I still have to go threw labor. And it scares the crap outta of me. It scared me the first time, cause I didn't know what to expect. It scares me this time because I do know what to expect. I hate hospitals, needles, the whole sh-bang.  I am worried about being home with Jakah and going into labor, Casey working 100 miles away (he doesn't work at the same place everyday) and I have to drive myself. Worried I will have Jensen in the car. (I have fast labor, Jakah was 9 hours from start to finish) Worried I can't find anyone to watch Jakah (having trouble lately just being able to go to the Dr and get internal ultrasounds done alone) Worried about bringing Jensen home and how Jakah will react. Worried about being able to go grocery shopping with both of them. Or being so tired from all the feedings that Jakah is neglected. Those are just a few worries going threw my head in a single day. (weird I know) 

I know 90% of these are silly worries and everything will be fine. Its just all unknown and the control freak in me is just going haywire. And I really don't want to go threw labor, but its too late to turn back now! Ha ha!

I am truly worried about going into labor alone with Jakah, having to drive myself to the hospital and then try to manage him there alone. It makes me nauseous just thinking about it. I wish I could feel better about it but with the way things are going lately that is what is going to happen. (again un-reliable babysitters / family)

We are down to the final countdown... either way 7 weeks at the most... and I am terrified

bwahahaha... maniacal laugh...

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12 comments:

  1. I like it when you share your thoughts on becoming a mom. It really is not all rosy. Wish more women joined you in telling it like it is. I am super excited to meet Jensen though. Hurray, only 7 to go!

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    1. Thank you Stasha, sometimes I feel like I am being a "downer" but its not always rosy, and It is how I feel :)

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  2. Ah you are right it really will all work out. I had my 2nd when my first was only 2. I was alone with my toddler when I went into labor and had to wait a few hours for my hubby to get home before we went to the hospital. It was stressful, but we made it! We got to the hospital around 6 and my son was born at 10:30!

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    1. Wow! Good to hear it wasn't on the side of the road, hopefully you still got drugs :)

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  3. Just wanted to add my two cents... P. was born at 34 weeks and was only in the NICU 12 days. It was scary but not bad, if that makes sense. So if you can manage not to worry about going a bit early - even though full term is always better - try to relax :) Other than that, two kids, you'll get used to it and it'll be great!

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    1. Thanks for the two cents, always helps hearing from others who have been threw it.

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  4. I was so done at that point too. Then my guy came 5 weeks early and spent two weeks in the NICU. He came home at 37 weeks so on the date I was negotiating with him for. I have no advice on labor as I had an emergency c-section but I understand your fears!

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    1. It is a little more relaxing hearing that others have gone threw it and it all worked out.

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  5. Just something to think about- if you are getting close and your husband is about to be gone- you can talk to your doctor about inducing. I know it's not for everyone, but my third was induced b/c I have super fast labors(in the hospital for less than an hour with my first and less than 2 with my second) and they didn't want me delivering on the side of the road.

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    1. I didn't know you can asked to be induced, I will have to talk to the Dr. Although he will only be gone 1 night, 6 hours away so he could drive if he had to. And you have really fast labors!

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  6. Seriously...if there is ever an emergency where you had to leave the house, we can take Jakah for you. Just come bang on the door or walk though the fence!!!!!!!!

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    1. Thanks Emily, I just never know if you guys are home or anything :)

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